Jy Simpkin has released a heartfelt statement after the North Melbourne captain's disastrous attempt to leave the Kangaroos in the trade period.
The 27-year-old opted to explore his options elsewhere, but Collingwood ended up being the only vague suitor and the Pies' valuation of the 173-game veteran fell well below North's required level.
Simpkin, who is in Europe on holiday, posted an emotional message to Instagram that detailed his troubles over the past year, including the loss of two grandparents.
The two-time best and fairest also acknowledged his actions have likely cost him the Kangaroos' captaincy.
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"Over the past 24 months footy has taken a toll on my mental health and in particular the last 12 months," he wrote.
"Especially with losing 2 very important loved ones in my life this year.
"I haven’t really been enjoying my footy as much as I would have liked and game day was becoming very hard over the course of the year.
"I was very open with the club through out the season on how I was feeling about everything.
"I love this club and my teammates as much as anything and without going into to much detail, although I never wanted to leave I thought that a change of environment may help spark my love for the game again, especially if it was best for both the club and myself.
"Everything happens for a reason and I’m exactly where I need to be.
"Never was it about my position and where I was playing, although we have had a lot of honest chats surrounding where I’m best suited to help this club.
"Whilst my leadership position may take a step back, I’m committed to continuing to give my all and help in every way possible to bring success as ultimately that’s all I am after.
"Thanks to those who have supported me through this tough time."